The toddler and preschool years are such an essential time period for helping children build the social and emotional skills that will equip them to build relationships as they grow. One way to help children understand more about their emotions is through a movement known as Gentle Parenting. If you’ve heard this term but you’re not quite sure what it means, we’ve put together a short guide to understanding how you can use this philosophy as you raise your children.
1. Get On Their Level
Can you imagine what it might feel like for a young child to be surrounded by adults who are so much bigger than they are? Gentle parenting encourages caregivers to physically place themselves on the same level as the child by crouching, squatting, or sitting. When you’re eye-to-eye with your preschooler, you may notice that they are raising their voice or tugging on your hand less often. Eye contact can make a big difference in helping your child feel known and loved!
2. Lead With Empathy
It’s a natural and healthy instinct to want to solve your child’s problems or shield them from experiencing disappointment. Often, we try to address a child’s frustrations by distracting them or reassuring them. Gentle parenting encourages you to first mirror back your child’s feelings before addressing the issue at hand. Paradoxically, rephrasing their words with empathy can often lead to a quicker resolution. Just think about going to coffee with a friend. When you bring up a frustration, you probably want to hear your friend affirm your concern before offering advice. The same is true for children!
3. Set Loving Boundaries
Boundaries are so important for keeping children safe and helping to teach self-soothing skills. When you introduce a rule like holding hands when crossing the street or treating a younger sibling gently, you can explain that you are setting a boundary in order to keep your child safe. Your wording can sound something like, “I’m here to keep you safe, so I can’t let you jump from couch to couch. I’ll play some music on my phone, and you can jump up and down on the floor with the music!”
4. Embrace Emotional Education
Children can have big emotions, and those emotions may feel confusing or overwhelming at times. A gentle parenting approach is centered around giving preschoolers words to express the feelings they may be having. Emoji-based charts can help pre-literate children point to the picture that describes how they’re feeling. Then, a parent can say, “Oh, I see! You felt sad when Grandpa had to leave and go back to his house. That’s why you threw the block at the door he left through.” Once the child has identified and confirmed their feeling, you can offer a hug and a suggestion for processing their emotion, such as: “Maybe we can draw a picture for Grandpa to see when he comes over next week.” While the child is free to refuse, pairing empathy with a concrete action can be incredibly comforting.
Helping Students Grow Academically, Emotionally, and Socially Every Day
The Gardner School understands the importance of social and emotional skills, along with academic excellence. We build emotional education into our daily schedule to help strengthen these skills. To understand why parents choose The Gardner School for their children to grow and learn, contact us to learn more or to schedule a virtual tour.