Every parent desires to raise children who are helpful, kind, and compassionate towards others. One way to do this is to help kids understand responsibility at an early age. When little ones know they’re part of a community, it’s a natural inclination to want to contribute to it. Even at a young age, children understand that their primary community is their family. That’s why giving kids age-appropriate responsibilities provides them with a sense of pride and competence.
Teaching children about responsibility early will help you raise children who are confident and resilient. And, as they grow, your little ones can be well-equipped to approach tasks and challenges with joy.
So, where do you begin? Here are three easy ways to integrate responsibility into your family structure with ease.
1. Don’t underestimate the power of extrinsic motivation.
Some experts argue against tying rewards to task completion, because they believe it discourages internal motivation. While intrinsic motivation is important to cultivate, there are times when external motivation is the right choice for a child. As an adult, you can probably think of many times when you’ve found the motivation to get out of bed by imagining the taste of your morning cup of coffee. Or, perhaps a great podcast has gotten you through mopping floors or putting away dishes.
Matching simple rewards with essential tasks can sometimes be the most effective combination. For children, putting away toys could be rewarded with an episode of a favorite television show or a visit to the park. Whenever possible, though, try to avoid using sugar or treats as a motivator, as this can potentially complicate a child’s feelings about food in general.
2. Keep directions simple and concise.
When helping children complete chores, clarity is key. Try to keep your instructions short—perhaps only a simple sentence or two. If the task has multiple components, just tackle one step at a time. Asking a child to “clean up the room” can be too abstract for concrete kiddos. Instead, you might give specific, singular instructions, such as: “First, I’d like you to pull your blanket to the top of your bed,” or “All the toys on the floor can go into this toy box.” After the task is complete, then reward your child with excitement and praise. A hug and a kind word can mean so much to your little one.
3. Make cleaning into a game.
Mary Poppins was onto something when she started to sing while the kids cleaned up the nursery, as there are several ways to make cleaning a game for little ones. First, the right tunes are totally essential. Blasting the soundtrack to your favorite children’s movie will get almost anyone motivated. If you need even more of an incentive, try timing the task to get it done quickly. Siblings can take turns timing each other, seeing who can set a personal record for putting away clothes or making beds.
4. Chore charts are a family’s best friend.
Using a chore chart to track responsibilities can take a bit of time to set up and maintain, but the visual cues and feedback it provides for kids can be worth it. Parents may remember the joy of getting a star or sticker on a worksheet they completed in school. Using stars, stickers, or magnets to track completed chores can be just as exciting at home. For younger kids, the novelty of racking up stickers is probably sufficient, but as they age, you can tie a certain number of stars to higher-value rewards, such as screen time or coins for a piggy bank. Tracking chores can be something you do as a family before or after dinner each day, so make it a part of your routine for it to stick!
Teaching Kids Responsibility for School and Beyond
The Gardner School understands the importance of social and emotional skills, along with academic excellence. We build responsibility and turn-taking into our daily schedule to help strengthen these skills. To understand why parents choose The Gardner School for their children to grow and learn, contact us to learn more or to schedule a virtual tour.